Battle of the sexes or the wits?

I was running through some of my old writings today and came across this interesting exchange which I had with an ex-colleague a few years back. I remembered the fun I had writing it and thought to share this. Enjoy!

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Main characters:
Lord Clarance Sashi ~ denoted by the acronym Lord C
Lady Leanne ~ denoted by the acronym Lady L

End credit commentator:
Mun Keong Esq. ~ denoted by the acronym MK Esq.

Let the battle begin ...


Lord C:
No one can explain but try they can
How God created this marvel called "MAN"

Lady L:
Hear ye! Hear ye! Ye delusional Man
Lord praise be for thy creation of WOMAN

Lord C:
HE created man first with all his best
HE then made woman with what was left!

Lady L:
God created man first I am sure we all agree
HE then made woman and improve a zillion degrees

Lord C:
"Perfection," women say, "is hard to find"
But only if you look through womenkind

Lady L:
"Perfection" in men is certainly hard to find
But in abundance when it comes to womenkind

Lord C:
To be honest, perfection cannot be found
But the male species is the closest around

Lady L:
A broken record I do so hate to sound
But alas! delusional man, there are plenty around

Lord C:
Look at a man from head to toe
and then my dear, perfection you will know

Lady L:
O! Imperfect men, you ain't women's foe
We can't help it if our perfect visage simply glow

Lord C:
The visage of women do glow that I agree
But without make-up, no such glow you will see

Lady L:
Make-up is just the tip of what makes a woman glow
What matters is the inner beauty that really shows

Lord C:
Men explored the earth and civilised the land
and now you women enjoy the conquests of men

Lady L:
Violence and war, that's the way of men
Gentleness and faith, that's the soft touch of women

Lord C:
The soft touch of a woman sure does good
But only in terms of satisfying the manhood

Lady L:
Bedroom and boardroom, woman all "sapu"
Woe to the man who thinks he is being "ampu"

Lord C:
Man don't cry as GOD made them strong
To defend the weak and right the wrong

Lady L:
Tears do not weaken a woman
Apathy do not strengthen a man

Lord C:
Apathy and strength is never the same
Men do shed tears but never in vain

Lady L:
Ah ... I suddenly note a change in the breeze
Man finally admit to shedding tears, gee wheez!

Lord C:
He won't let emotions run his life
Cause that's the job GOD gave his wife!

Lady L:
Emotions does not mean the mind is ruled by the heart
It merely means the mind sees clearer with the heart

Lord C:
Emotional decisions can ruin ones mind
And is a common problem with womenkind!

Lady L:
Wonder why man do so fear emotions
Would he go insane, oh what a silly notion

Lord C:
He is MAN and that is what he will be
He will work hard to feed his family

Lady L:
She is WOMAN and that she shall stay
But it does not mean to Man she will always fall prey

Lord C:
She won't always fall prey but fall she will
She can't help herself for he is her world!

Lady L:
Gone are the days where Man rules the world
Alas! He is mistaken if he still believes he rules the world

Lord C:
Of the load he carries he will not complain
He'll carry it in silence and bear the pain

Lady L:
We ain't at war here, that's not the case
We can't help it if you fall for our face

Lord C:
Fall for her face, that's alright for a start
But a man truly falls after seeing her heart

Lady L:
Hmmm ... finally a wise statement from the MAN
Bet you it's all due to the touch of a WOMAN. :)

Lord C:
For the gift of man, you should thank GOD
For without him, I'm sure you would be bored

Lady L:
For the presence of Woman spices your life
Without which Man will find it difficult to thrive

Lord C:
Spice up our life, you truly wish
But too much spice makes you puke in a dish

Lady L:
Thus it takes a strong man to bear what she can dish
That's such a rarity but is what women wish!

Lord C:
So I would advise you to pray till your final hour
That you would get some of Man's wisdom and power.

Lady L:
If wisdom and power is so sought by Man
Think how far a woman's love can heel a man

Lord C:
Wisdom and power is not sought by man
It is bestowed as part of GOD's plan
So dear woman, let's just make things right
Adore your man for it's futile to fight.

Lady L:
Ahh .. GOD's divine plan for humankind
Is not about battles, is not about war
If you think this is a fight, you must be blind
Coz we women make love, not war!

MK Esq:
At the end of the day
Leanne and Sashi
Will get mushy
Proving once again, HE works in mysterious ways!